Yeah, so I’m still in the valley of decision about whether or not to curse on this blog. This seems like the STUPIDEST thing to talk about but it is a big issue for me. I’m going through my whole “settling into my true self” thing, and I gotta be honest: My true self has a foul mouth. I mean, FUCK! I just need to say it to get the aggression out. The crazy in me sometimes wants to just ram my car into the back of the person who just cut me off, or punch a slow-walking old lady in the face. I don’t, because jail time, social norms and blah blah blah– so can I PLEASE.JUST.CURSE?
If I had a dollar for every time a guy told me that cursing is unattractive– well, I would still be pretty poor but I would have several more dollars. Can someone tell me why it’s so unbecoming?? I’m a single mother of two, I’m so fucking tired ALL of the time, can I just have the one thing?!! And on top of that, I still make an effort to dress nice, to do my hair, shower, exerc– ok, I’m not exercising as often as I should but you get the point. I used to wake up at 5:45 every morning, busting my ass to get two kids ready and myself out the door to commence one of the longest commutes in history. I almost killed about four people everyday trying to put on some fucking concealer and eyeliner while driving just to look at least half awake for the day. Life is shitty sometimes, I’m always tired– and YES, I said that again– but you mean to tell me that I can’t curse about it because it’s UNLADYLIKE?? I popped two kids out of my vagina, that doesn’t give me a little street cred among the ladies???
And I’m good, you know? I curb the urge when I’m around my non-cursing friends. I just feel like I’m going to be stoned to death if I dare say “dammit” when I bang my toe yet again on some shit that’s ALWAYS on my messy livingroom floor. My six year old is the FCC and bad language vigilante. “Aww, Mommy! You said a bad word…” My response, “Fuck! I did it again!” So, I can’t even curse in my own home, I just want to be able to pop some shit loose on my very own blog for the love of someone’s love who is worthy to go into this sentence!
Then I think of my parents…and the respectable people who may relate to my basic views that simply just can’t stand the thought, sound or sight foul language. I think to myself, “Shit, I can’t talk like that, not even on my own blog.” So, for the sake of making blog life (not at all related to thug life) more palatable I will curb the cursing as much as possible. But be warned– I need the F word in my life. If I’m talking to you and accidentally let one fly don’t be obnoxious and comment on it. I’m trying 😦
I understand what you’re saying about using curse words. I didn’t until a short time ago because of the whole ladylike thing and I didn’t want to offend people. I think the balance is key and just knowing when and where to let loose as with most things. But this is your blog and if it needs to be said this is the space to do it and also Walmart. You can get away with a lot of stuff at Walmart.
…that’s a good idea. Maybe I won’t curse for a month and then just go to Walmart and scream the F word
First of all: who cares what random guys think is ladylike or not? If you want to swear, then swear. If you don’t want to, don’t. If you’re dating a guy that doesn’t like it when you swear, then I guess you can address it if/when it is an issue, or just don’t date a guy that cares. As a “lady” I don’t think that it makes you unladylike to swear. Men need to stop trying to control women to make them into their version of what they think women should be. Don’t tell women to stop swearing, or to smile – I digress.
On the other hand, as someone who doesn’t swear, I think that it is unattractive when guys swear, but I don’t walk
around telling them that gentlemen don’t swear. I just wouldn’t date someone that swears.
As someone that doesn’t swear, I know people that do and I watch TV and movies that have swearing in them. The way I think look at it is: it is what it is and it a’int what it a’int. So, when I read swearing on your blog, I take it as your personal expression and you have the freedom and right to say whatever you like. However, it does give me pause when thinking about sharing it on Facebook or other places.
You make a good point about being less likely to repost on social media if it has cursing. Then again, my overall content may cause people to not want to “Like” or post on social media. I suppose I just have to write as I see fit and this post is a general “my bad” to anyone who is offended by how I choose to express myself.
Who the fuck cares if people are offended? Just saying what everyone was thinking. Ha!
I am inclined to feel that way, but that’s the catch 22 of being a “writer”. You have to do what’s in your heart but you still have to keep in mind an audience. I would hate to disappoint the four people that read this blog!
Your blog is your release. be as honest as you want to be. No restrictions. It is your escape. Follow the social norms or whatever elsewhere (i agree with not cursing around the kids), but your writing is your therapy. When you realize you can’t please everybody, that is when freedom begins.