I write this for the bleeding hearts like myself. I wouldn’t normally post something like this but I had to do a follow up just to prove that you can’t make up this kind of random ridiculousness. I’ll mention that I’ve only dealt with this guy for about 3 months and he or any of his friends (not that I know them) read this blog or give a damn about my writing. In fact, no guy that has claimed an interest in me seems to have an interest in the blog—It’s only every deep thing about me EVER on these pages…but whatever!
I felt bad for the boy, as if I broke his heart—which is a term I hate to use because I don’t like to be so arrogant as to believe I have that kind of power over anyone. Anyway, he went away and licked his wounds and called me up a few days later apologizing and understanding of my need for space. The next day, he texted that he missed me. I’ve dealt with men hardened by disappointment in life and love so it is actually nice to deal with one who wears his heart on his sleeve. I have an affection for him that might not be very deep now that I think of it, but it’s there. I admitted I missed him as well—maybe as an ex-lover or maybe as one misses the faint glow of the “check engine” light on your car that goes away after you fix it—I’m not very sure. He said he wanted to be with me, to grow with me and all the other sensitive shit that would usually warm hearts and liquefy panties—and as a woman of words, I fell for it and began to second guess myself.
Throughout texting all day (I couldn’t speak to him on the phone, I’m actually working this week), I acquiesced to his desire to see me coming to the conclusion that maybe I could balance him and all my other life stresses if we only saw each other one day a week. He was back in.
At 4:00pm :
Him: You home?
Me: I’m at work. Don’t get off until 5
Him: I need a big favor, it’s an emergency
Were it anyone else I would be alarmed, but I KNOW him. This was not an emergency—this was only a test (-_-). Sure enough I wait until 5:00 to call when I am off work, and long story short, he’s fallen onto hard times at the place he is currently staying and would like to stay with me indefinitely. Chaos ensued—feelings were hurt, yada yada yada… I definitely won’t be speaking to him anymore. My last words:
Me: This is not a favor, it is a big deal to ask someone to move indefinitely. You know that I have children and that my brother lives with me. This means that you have not been listening to me. I am not a bottom bitch, I will listen to your troubles but I won’t be a part of them—I have to look out for my children and myself right now. We aren’t even together, it makes no sense for me to agree to something like that!
Time of Death: 5:36pm.
And THAT, Ladies and Gentleman, is why I’m choosing to gracefully bow out of the dating game. I don’t believe in burning bridges—but as for this situation: I don’t need no water, let that motherf*cker burn.
Asking something like that, he was DOA.
Lmao! I don’t know about physically harming the guy but I don’t want to keep him in my life in any capacity. I’ve done the whole “holding a man down” thing. I don’t want it anymore
Good job being strong! Someday remind me to blog about the amount of random losers I let move in with me when I had my own apartment. I mean sometimes I wasn’t even like, “Yeah, you can move in with me.” I was like, “Yeah, you can stay ONE NIGHT.” Or “Yeah, you can come over for dinner.” And they’d just manage not to leave. Like vampires and cops, they can’t walk in unless invited, but once you invite them in, its all over!
Hahaha! Yes, I call that “post up” syndrome, where the guy gets one invitation to your house and just kind of permanently stays. I’m just so tired of being so nurturing to men who prob wouldn’t do the same for me. He barely liked to take out the trash so why would I let him move in?! Definitely write about it–I was embarrassed to at first but it was kind of therapeutic to find out others can relate.
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