The last heartbeats of this awful year slow; I can’t wait for it to finally die. I can’t allow myself to think of all the things—the people– I have to leave behind in order to gain sanity and start from the beginning again.
I believe in love and resurrection and rebirth of good things out of something that’s turned to spoil. However, this year I had to make the painful decision and realize that some things will never change. Some people will never rise to the occasion, the potential, the expectation—some people will sacrifice you for them every.single.time. You can never force others to do what’s right, you can only close the door and swear to yourself it will never be opened again.
I give up on you 2013. I no longer trust and believe in you. I know that you have no words to defend yourself; and that you choose to watch things unfold and to let the chips fall where they may. I know that you chose to sit idly by while children were tortured, cities were ruined, lives were ended. I know to you it means nothing, and as you come to an end you won’t right any of your wrongs or clarify any of your mistakes. I know that you have nothing to say of the destruction you’ve left in your wake.
I leave you behind 2013, and begin a new year gaining strength by picking up the pieces you left scattered, frozen by your coldness and shattered by your indifference.
Unreliable, incorrigible, inconsistent, malevolent, and worst of all: silent. While waiting for you to say something I gave up on you…