Tips for Keeping Your Shit Together in 2017

In spite of the whopping necrology list of celebrities gone too soon this year, the shit show of a presidential election and a constant state of empty pockets— I managed to eek out a pretty decent experience from 2016.



Unfortunately, there is no real way to speak positively about a year that’s kicked so many people’s asses in a way that doesn’t make you seem like a douchebag. SO, instead of writing some big, long end of the year wrap up I’m just going to list a few lessons that helped me grow and get out of my own head this year. I’m not sure if this will help anyone else, but I feel good about writing it all out and using it as a guide to get me through 2017.

Read with a grain of salt, comment about your favorite and I am open to additions!

Tips for Not Falling Apart Any Year—Let Alone 2016, 2017 and Beyond…

  • Always stay in touch with reality and accept truth.

Social media kicked my ass this year! I find Facebook and Instagram addicting and fun and time consuming but most of all it is a huge buzz kill for me and my self-esteem. Toward the end of the year I even made the decision to shut down my personal Facebook account and operate solely from my Whiskey Girl page. I did so because I was having a hard time staying in touch with reality. People seem so different from the person they choose to portray on computer screen and I waste a lot of time feeling down and comparing myself to people who are essentially not even real.

Furthermore, truth is truth and that is inescapable. I support the idea of believing in your own hype but it’s also important to keep a grip on reality. Self-delusion leads to entitlement and something about paying my last $5 on an open mic I can barely afford the gas money to get to reminds me of what’s real. I am not a rock star writer with thousands of followers and a publisher. Should I be? Well—yeah, but I’m not and that’s not only real to me, but it’s also ok.

  • Forgive yourself.

I wrote two chapbooks this year that dealt with a lot of past pain, confusion and frustration. It was a cathartic experience that helped me realize that on some level I was using pain as my claim to fame. I couldn’t stop writing about it because I couldn’t seem to let it go– I was harboring all sorts of guilt because for some reason I thought I was smarter than what I had allowed to happen to me. All of my life people have assumed that I am smart, so I went along with it thinking that intelligence somehow made me above making poor decisions in life and love. I carried so much bitterness because I was just mad at myself for being stupid enough to fall for weak game, weak dick and the lies and treachery of weak people.

At some point it finally hit me that it’s easy to forgive people for their wrongdoings but much harder to forgive yourself and let that shit go. People suck– it’s not unheard of to be duped and devastated by some loser on a mission to destroy the feelings of others to make up for their own insecurities. I got caught in the crossfire because I made very stupid but also very normal mistakes. I finally decided to forgive myself and let that shit go.

  • Completely avoid drama!

Seriously, run. Getting into the business of others or any kind of dramatic excitement as part of your day that makes your heart beat a little faster and your adrenaline rush is a thrilling feeling. Until it’s clean up time and you find yourself losing friends, clearing up messes and fighting to protect your reputation all the time. It is an exhausting process. The older I get the less energy I have to chase that high– that’s what drugs are for.

  • Steer clear of negative energy.

How granola of me, but however zen you are or aren’t most of us know when someone comes with a suitcase load of bad vibes. There are a few people I love dearly but I steer clear of them because their negativity brings me down. I fight depression enough on my own, I don’t need to surround myself with anyone that will add to it, whether it is their intention or not. At 32 I don’t spend a lot of time telling people about themselves or over explaining my actions– if I don’t vibe with you then I’m not fucking with you. Period.


  • Jump all the way out there!

I’ve embarrassed myself a tiny bit this year, applying for jobs I had passion for but perhaps


I don’t mind jumping all the way out there– still won’t catch me naked in the gym!

not experience. I’ve sent my Electronic Press Kit to a few places that probably had a good laugh before deleting my email but at least I tried…



  • Treat rejection as “not now” instead of NO

…and I received plenty of “no’s” that I refuse to take personally. I  can’t accomplish all of the grandiose things that I would like to right this second but I still plan to in the future. The “No” only stands in my way for right now.

  • Pay it Forward (Always!)


  • Double Down on privacy

This year my private life, especially my romantic life hit a few rough patches. In recent years I decided to be more private about certain aspects of my life and I have doubled down on that action because I learned something about myself. While I think it’s normal and common to seek the advice of others I ultimately choose to make decisions based on my own desires and thought processes. I no longer feel the need to have someone else shine light on the dark spaces in my life to help me come to a conclusion about how I should personally feel or react to it. The happy and complicated and grey area things in my life I choose to hold closely to my chest. There is something special about keeping a few things to yourself in a world that promotes just the opposite.

  • Remain unbothered.

By everything. As an overthinker I am bothered by too much, but I do my best to never let it show and to stay focused and busy!

  • Staying busy is a perfectly acceptable coping mechanism.

I just need purpose and a goal to strive toward and I’m golden…



I’m really hoping that these are some things I can use in the future to help me elevate to the next level. I am grateful to have been able to accomplish Big Things in 2016– next year I can only work harder to take things to the next level. Who is coming with me?



Click here  for a picture gallery of some 2016 highlights! See you next year– good vibes always!




Top 5 Posts of 2015 – Check it out!!

Clearly, I have yet to fully transition into 2016…check out my top posts of 2015 and click below to see the complete  2015 Annual Report for WG’s Embrace the Crazy Blog!

Thank you to all who continue to read and engage– if you would like to subscribe to my personal newsletter to keep you in the know with upcoming projects, spoken word events and activities please visit my website:

Happy reading in 2016!


You See, I’m Very Poor

Let’s Talk About Porn, Baby (Part 2)

Welcome to the Friendzone


Pumpkin Eater

The stats helper monkeys prepared a 2015 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

A San Francisco cable car holds 60 people. This blog was viewed about 3,200 times in 2015. If it were a cable car, it would take about 53 trips to carry that many people.

Click here to see the complete report.

I Know How I’m Going to Be Murdered



So, I live in the hood. I don’t care too much for the terminology but I suppose if I had to describe the environment I live in that would be it, so it is what it is. I like where I live very much….it’s off the bus route, there are 3 grocery stores within walking distance and about 8 liquor stores in walking distance. However awesome that sounds, I know I’m going to be murdered here and how and why.

My biggest pet peeve of all is the random black woman attitude. Yes, I myself can be bitchy or rigid if you cross me but for the most part that’s not my normal disposition. Just yesterday I proclaimed that I needed to work on my temper and I feel I’m doing very well because I managed to not punch this woman in the face, thus avoiding an assault and battery charge.

So, I clamber on the bus all disheveled and disoriented as usual because morning. As soon as I pay my fare the bus starts moving– because God forbid the bus driver lose three seconds of travel time waiting for me to sit down–and I swing into a seat next to a sleeping woman. I think I said excuse me but in retrospect I don’t know and don’t really care all that much. Why? Because this particular bus is crowded every single day, especially in the morning so I have no patience for the self-centered assholes who store their bags in the seat beside them OR, in her case, store their bag in between  her and the wall which meant she was sitting well into the middle of a two-seater! Anyway, I swing my ass into the edge of the seat as far as it will go and grumpy bear wakes up complaining in the deepest voice I’ve heard on any woman, “Damn, can I scoot over first?!”  
Me: You sure can.
Her: You didn’t even say excuse me! You just–
Me: OR maybe I did, you just can’t hear me with your headphones on. It’s early in the morning ain’t nobody messin with you! Shit!
Her: *pulls out gun and shoots me in the face*

Ok, the last part obviously didn’t happen, but it will if I don’t learn to curb my smart ass mouth. I thought about just switching seats, but I’m a grown woman—that’s where I wanted to sit so I should be able to sit there. So I sat there, all the while entertaining violent thoughts of just smooshing her stupid head against the window and eating her snacks she had lying on top of her bag. (I don’t know why I would eat her snacks—perhaps that kind of violence makes you hungry, I would imagine…) It’s December 31, I still have some time to turn over a new leaf, and I can only pray I don’t get murdered for being a jerk in the meantime 🙂

2014 New Year Resolutions


Resolutions? Hmm, not sure if we have time for them all. When you’re a mess there’s kind of a lot to cover.

  • I want to lose weight go to the gym regularly. I don’t want to be thin, I just want to be hot. If I could flatten my stomach and tone my arms I would be the happiest girl, but the ex-husband dabbled in personal training enough for me to know that weight loss doesn’t exactly work like that. Anyway, to the gym I go—hopefully.


  • I want to be better with money because I am absolutely over being poor. I want to be able to pay all of my bills and have the option of eating as well. For the most part my clinical depression manifests itself in my diet and social interactions—but SOME of my fiscal irresponsibility can be accredited to one of my many methods of self-medicating. I don’t know, sometimes it just feels good to BUY! That is, until I  check my account balance and I panic thinking I’m the victim of identity fraud. Nope! That was just me making stupid decisions again. I am actually awesome at creating budgets…I’m just not that good at sticking to them :-/


  • I also need to stop giving hot guys a pass. When I feel I have a connection with someone from the opposite sex it’s hard for me to DISconnect, because actually having a bond beyond the physical is so rare nowadays. But I have to be honest with myself and admit that when I feel I’ve connected with someone that gets my nether regions all juicy my bullshit tolerance level goes through the roof! This year, I want to be better at putting my foot down and not accepting half ass texts and dick pics as proper dating courtship.


  • I need to write more. I spend a saddening amount of time literally staring into space and doing nothing. Which leads me to the next one:


  • I need to try to be more present and focused. Sometimes while driving if I really like a song, I will close my eyes to feel the lyrics. As it turns out, that is not the safest way to go about things while operating a vehicle. I have to stop zoning out and I need to do so by doing things like: engaging, listening to people who are talking to me, and keeping my eyes open while driving, etc. I have to stop disappearing into my own world—even if it’s way more fun there!


  • I also need to stop fantasizing about sex so much. I don’t know what the hell is wrong with me, lately. Maybe because I’ve sort of taken a stand against casual sex (I think, I don’t know) I keep thinking about it, which isn’t helpful. I’m considering qualifying touching myself as casual sex since it’s not like I’m following up and trying to nurture a relationship with myself either. I guess I’m just a hit it and quit it type of girl.
  • I need to be more decisive.
  • I need to take better care of my fingernails.
  • I need to shave my body hair more often in between sexual partners.
  • I need to stop using my unclean room as a shield to prevent me from having casual sex.
  • I need to stop being so personal and gross on this blog.
  • I need to work on my temper; and it’s fine to be open an honest but I need to stop being so abrasive.

I’m Giving Up On You

The last heartbeats of this awful year slow; I can’t wait for it to finally die. I can’t allow myself to think of all the things—the people– I have to leave behind in order to gain sanity and start from the beginning again.

I believe in love and resurrection and rebirth of good things out of something that’s turned to spoil. However, this year I had to make the painful decision and realize that some things will never change. Some people will never rise to the occasion, the potential, the expectation—some people will sacrifice you for them every.single.time. You can never force others to do what’s right, you can only close the door and swear to yourself it will never be opened again.

I give up on you 2013. I no longer trust and believe in you. I know that you have no words to defend yourself; and that you choose to watch things unfold and to let the chips fall where they may. I know that you chose to sit idly by while children were tortured, cities were ruined, lives were ended. I know to you it means nothing, and as you come to an end you won’t right any of your wrongs or clarify any of your mistakes. I know that you have nothing to say of the destruction you’ve left in your wake.

I leave you behind 2013, and begin a new year gaining strength by picking up the pieces you left scattered, frozen by your coldness and shattered by your indifference.

Unreliable, incorrigible, inconsistent, malevolent, and worst of all: silent. While waiting for you to say something I gave up on you…

(Video from: